Ever fly into a two-gate airport in the middle of nowhere and find out that it's
actually "Upper East Backwoods International Airport"?
One flight to Canada, Mexico, or hijacked to Cuba, and suddenly Fred the
baggage handler starts putting on airs.
We've got NFL Europe news, so why can't we be International too? Darn it, if
the New York Times can have an international edition, then so can I. The Times
even admits to just making stuff up, and we just joke about it when
things are boring. So, here goes...
Bernies Insiders Cleveland Browns News
Update - International Edition
We start our global round-up of Browns news
today in Frankfurt, Germany, where developing Browns TE Chad Mustard scored his
first touchdown of the season. The auspicious moment came with less than two
minutes left and the Frankfurt Galaxy pounding Mustard's Rhein Fire squad 38-0
(read: "garbage time"), but six points is six points. Mustard is the only Browns
player in NFL Europe to accumulate any points this Spring, as he also snared a
two-point conversion last week. Mustard had three receptions for twenty-four
yards in the game.
The Frankfurt Galaxy, a squad that includes Browns CB
Kalvin Pearson, have qualified for NFL Europe's World Bowl thanks to an
impressive defense. The Galaxy secondary also includes ex-Browns Rashidi Barnes
and Calvin Spears in starting roles.
Just curious: Why is it a "World Bowl"
rather than a "Europe Bowl"?
Eh, whatever. (shrug)
Jay Taylor, the Fire's punter, hasn't put together eye-popping stats in
Europe, but he did nail three of his six punts inside the 20 yard line. The box
scores coming from Europe seem to hint at steady improvement on the part of
Taylor, but he will certainly have his work cut out for him if he intends to
displace incumbent punter Chris Gardocki.
Down in Barcelona, the home town
Dragons got their hats handed to them by the Scottish Claymores. Dimitrius
Breedlove, a WR for Barcelona, got into the game this week but didn't catch a
pass. Breedlove has not seen a tremendous amount of action in Spain, and has
only caught a couple of passes on the season.
Bernies Insiders Cleveland Browns News Update - National Edition
In today's domestic Browns news, charges have been dropped against Browns
linebacker (1988-1991) Van Waiters.
This is especially relevant given that news accounts indicate that
there really wasn't
anything at all to the charges.
Waiters teaches middle school, an occupation which has to be alternately
rewarding and horrifying. I don't think I would last more than about five
minutes in front of a gang of fourteen-year-olds without blowing a gasket, and I
have enormous respect for those people who work with adolescents each day,
trying to do their best to teach our kids.
Of course, I'm biased. My mother
taught middle school, and both of my in-laws are teachers, so I've heard about
the challenges they face in their jobs.
In the case of Waiters, the charges
suggested that Waiters grabbed a kid by the throat, threw him over a desk and
punched him. Hence, he was brought up on charges of aggravated child abuse.
According to eyewitness accounts, however, it was Waiters who was attacked
and was holding the teenager at bay and defending himself. The purported victim
had "too many inconsistencies" in his story.
I guess if you really want a good
occupation for getting sued or getting brought up on charges, it is teaching the
children of our incredibly litigious society.
If there is a true tragedy in
this, it will be with those people who scanned the news, formed the association
between yet another football player and yet another legal problem and didn't
read the follow-up. What I'm reading from today's story: Van Waiters was
innocent, there was nothing to the charges, and another teacher got dragged into
court while trying to do his job.
Then again, I have perhaps been overly sensitized to the challenges teachers
face, so read the article linked above and draw your own conclusions.
players draw the media like moths to a light, and Waiters case wasn't any
different. The odds that we would have ever heard of this if Waiters wasn't a
player are slim. Make that "none".
Last year's Browns' starting linebacker Darren Hambrick, who has been
accused of absolutely nothing, is listed as
a defense witness in an article in a Florida murder. It appears journalist
made sure that Hambrick's name was dropped even though he has no involvement in
the subject of the article.
Don't we have enough football players in trouble
without innocent ones getting dragged into the muck at every opportunity?
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free to . I'm not always fast to respond, but I'm pretty good at
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